#Metoo and Dating

#Metoo and Dating

If you are not familiar with the #metoo movement, here is a quick overview. In 2017, this movement began to bring awareness to the prevalence of the sexual harassment and assault of women. This movement quickly gained popularity when women online shared the metoo hashtag along with their own stories of sexual harassment and assault. For many, it was shocking to learn just how many women had been exposed to these kinds of experiences.  These women never shared their stories before. We learned from this movement that many women often stayed quiet about their experiences for fear of judgment. The #metoo movement helped women come together, speak out about their experiences, and support each other.  But how has this movement influenced our dating in 2018?


While women felt empowered by the #metoo movement, many men reported that they now feel nervous when dating.  They are not sure what is ok and what is not when it comes to their own behavior. This movement shed light on what so many women have been suffering through, but it also created confusion.  Where is the line between harassment and flirtation?

“I’m still not sure where to draw the lines with sexual escalation. How can someone escalate appropriately and know where to draw the lines?” —David


For some, it feels like #metoo has divided us into two sides—men vs. women. On one side, women used their voices to tell their stories and reclaim power, while men, on the other side, grew quiet. This made us wonder if this movement had a negative effect on men, who started to experience insecurities regarding freely expressing themselves when it comes to women. Many men started to question their own behavior around women and worried about crossing any lines. Unfortunately, those questions and insecurities often came from the men who hadn’t done anything wrong and didn’t need to question their behavior.


“When I need to approach a woman, I feel chills down my spine.” —Bill


The #metoo movement taught us many important lessons about what women go through and opened our eyes to the problem of sexual harassment and assault. However, many women still want men to take on the more masculine and assertive role when it comes to dating. They want to feel wanted by and attractive to the man who is pursuing them. Smart women recognize that not all men are the same and can appreciate it when respectful men show an interest in us.


“The #metoo movement was necessary but painful, and some men are being unfairly ruined. We (women) have an obligation to judge each case individually and not lump all men into one basket.” —Davina

It should be clearly stated that women never want to be harassed, but they do want healthy masculine energy from men. And for the most part, men shouldn’t let anxiety over #metoo overwhelm them when it comes to interacting with women; if you’re kind, polite, and respectful, you aren’t the kind of man this movement is talking about.  As long as you date with good intentions, you have no need to worry.


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